the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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