bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
