oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
