so explain again why im purple
no
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
