he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
