Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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