Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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