You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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