Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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