Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
