smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
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