I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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