If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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