Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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