Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
