have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
