I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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