Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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