If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I need a burrito and a hug.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
