He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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