it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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