He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
