just tell him i said nine months
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
