The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
