THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize
