So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
