i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
