i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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