He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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