new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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