Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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