You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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