you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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