I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
