I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
