I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
