Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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