I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
