yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
