Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Randomize