you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Watching her eat just hurts me
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
