I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
