Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
