Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
