Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
