So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
