Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
