Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
