it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
