Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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